Loving an Engineer is something else...
In a predominately male field, being a female studio owner is hard. When I first met my soon to be husband, I watched him do his thing with his music but never really paid much attention to it. I would often just keep myself busy as he worked. I’d do laundry, clean up the house, watch TV or whatever it took to avoid boredom without making too much noise to disturb him. As our relationship grew, I quickly learned this was not just your typical hobby. This man would eat, sleep and breathe music if I let him. As our relationship grew into a family, his dedication to his craft grew. He was putting food on the table with this skill. Watching the client base and income grow, I stopped just giving him time to work and started paying attention to what he was doing.
It was then I realized the happiness and drive that his musical talents were providing him. There were times he’d be annoyed, tired or just withdrawn from me, and after a few hours mixing or recording all that vanished. He would be rejuvenated, helpful, and back to his humorous self. Recognizing that huge impact music had on him made me want to support it. But I struggled with figuring out how I show him my support. I wanted him to be happy, but the hours spent in music meant that I was often overwhelmed as a new mom and feeling like I was doing everything on my own around the house while he got lost in the music. Something had to give. I couldn’t support his happiness at the expense of my own. I then realized the perfect compromise… learning his craft.
I initiated this change subtly at first. I would sit in the room while he would work, just listening while I would be on my phone and see how he reacted to my presence. I was shocked when it didn’t bother him or the clients when I was sitting in on his recording sessions. I'm so used to the typical business models where family and friends can’t just show up to your job unannounced. But this workplace isn’t like this. I quickly learned that my attendance wasn't just fine, but also encouraged. A client made a comment to Will one day. He said “Man… I wish my girl would support me like your girl does.” That made me smile, but also finally connected the dots on the best way to support him. Will wasn’t spending hours upon hours making music for the hell of it. He was putting in all this work because it is his passion that he was getting paid for doing. It finally clicked… I would support him by helping him turn his passion into a career.
Once I stopped thinking of engineering as a hobby and instead a business… our entire world changed. Investments I would have never imagined started being made. Thousands spent on computers, monitors, gear, microphones, plugins and more. But these investments weren’t just done on a whim. Every purchase was discussed together and with these discussions, I learned a little bit more about his craft. I witnessed the investments we made turn into results I could actually hear. The night of New Year’s Eve, my man called me utterly defeated. He had been disliking his part-time job serving for a while… but that night was it for me. Hearing his voice, I knew in my heart that I could not allow my man to be miserable knowing he could make money doing what he loved right from home. I told him to quit. Right there, on the spot, New Year’s Eve, huge rush… just told him to tip out and come home.
At first, I was terrified inside. But I prayed on it and put all my faith in God and this dedicated man that everything would be fine. He began working full time at Quality Touch Studios, LLC the very next day. We struggled on and off our first year, learning along the way. I pushed him to find the balance between work and family. We had to learn not to chase clients and just allow the quality we put out to bring them to us. I supported him behind the scenes with marketing, financials, and more. There were times I debated asking him to find another part-time job, but I’m glad I didn’t. I am amazed at the growth, prosperity, and happiness that this transition into entrepreneurship has brought our entire family. We are four years strong together and have plans on expanding our brand.
Loving an engineer can be hard. But when I’m struggling with feeling lonely or annoyed from the long hours and songs on repeat as he mixes, I don’t hold it in. I go up and spend time with him. Listening, learning the basics of his craft, spending time together in the studio. I've learned to let music become my release just like it is for him. We’ve played around making beats together. He’s taught me to run a recording session and put together a static mix. It’s certainly not something I could do full time like he does. I like staying behind the scenes in our business because that’s what I’m good at. But loving an engineer sometimes means learning to love what he does and incorporating that into your relationship so that the long hours and mental strain working in music requires brings you closer rather than tearing you apart.